Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Confession...a little late.

Why can't I EVER be on time? I ask myself this question over and over. It doesn't matter what time I start, I would say that 90% of the time I am late.

I have decided that it is out of my control. I was destined to be late.

Here is my reasoning:

* For starters, I am a woman. Now, hold on. Hold on. Don't get those undies in a ruffle. Admit it, ladies, we take a lot longer to get ready than most men. They may take longer in the shower, at least mine does, but beauty like ours takes time. Unless of course it doesn't. In which case we hate you!

* I was born into a family with 8 children, 7 of us were girls. Getting 10 people anywhere on time is quite the accomplishment. Needless to say, as hard as we tried, it didn't always happen. In fact, people would tell us that things started earlier than they did so that we would be there when it really started.

* I have short legs. Long legs = punctual. Short legs = tardy.
* I married into the Deaf culture. Late is the name of their game. When we went to our Deaf church in AZ, we showed up 45 minutes late for church every week once and it had just started. Late is on time.

* I have 5 children ages 10 and under. Enough said.

It's what I was meant to be. Some people are meant to paint masterpieces. Others are destined to be Olympians. Me? Wouldn't you agree that by birth and marriage, I was destined to be late?

Don't get me wrong, being late isn't all bad, really. There are some benefits.

* It gives people a way to get to know you. You are late to church and the only seats left are the ones up front. Without even one word coming out of your mouth, everyone knows who you are. See what I mean. Instant popularity.

* People don't ask you to bring anything too important because by the time you get there, they won't need it anymore.

* You get there just in time for dessert.

I do try to be on time. Really, I do. I've just accepted that fact that my time to be early or at least on time will come.

It just isn't now.

The tortoise was slow but steady. He may not have gotten there on time, but he did get there. He was destined for lateness, and see, he was a winner in the end. There is hope. 

Destined for greatness, maybe.

Destined for lateness... 
 
...that's me!!
 
Thanks, Mama Kat, for getting me to confess the obvious. What's your confession?

12 comments:

CB said...

Now that my husband is the Bishop we have to be a little more punctual but when he first got called as a counselor years ago I didn't like the way all of his meetings infringed (ha ha) on our Sunday family dinner time. So one time I reset the kitchen clock so he would stay home for dinner but it made him late for his meeting.
yes - i was naughty - he forgave me - what can I say!
Sometimes I wish I could be late for stuff! I like your reasoning :-D

paige said...

You've convinced me you're justified. Especially the thing about bringing something. I have an aunt who never has to bring anything because she's always late - by hours. One time she had to bring stuffing to Thanksgiving and she was 2.5 hours late. NOT COOL. She's a dessert arriver now. :)

Unknown said...

Interesting insight on being late :) I'm very OCD about punctuality. I get all hyperventilated and panic attacky when I discover that I'm going to be late...even if it's by 5 minutes. It's actually pretty annoying to have this need to be puntual all the time. I do agree that having kids slows you down a lot though. Maybe I should take your reasons for being late and apply it to my life. Maybe then I can allow myself to be late from time to time too :)

Jenny said...

You, my dear, are the Queen of Excuses (ummm.... I mean reasoning!) This whole post made me laugh. I'm soooo using the short legs line!

Lisa said...

I forgive you. And I want to be as popular as you are, therefore, scootch on over on that church pew. I'm shoving my way in at the half hour mark. :)

One Photo said...

Well I might forget birthdays and anniversaries but I am never late for anything, I am always early and make sure I allow plenty of time for any unforeseen delays. That's just me though, control freak!

Susan Anderson said...

And you never get asked to say the opening prayer!

;)

Mary said...

I've never thought about those benefits before! I used to be 15 minutes early every where I went, but it's getting harder to be on time lately, and I only have to get myself anywhere most of the time! I'm thinking this blogging may be the culprit!
There were 6 girls & 4 boys in my family, but I don't remember being late very often. Hmmmm...gonna have to ask mom about that one!

Debbie said...

They say a group will be late by the number of minutes that is the square of the number of people involved. So with 10 people you could expect to be 1 1/2 hours late to everything. Anything less is a triumph!

Anonymous said...

My new mantra is" I'll get there when I get there.". I hate being late and I can get myself in a tizzy when I am running late. I have always envied those people who can leave for a meeting across town 10 minutes before they are due and not think twice about it. So I guess my confession would be that I am a little neurotic about being late. - G

Morgan said...

I'm SO with you on this. I'm late to everything, always. Thanks for the laugh!

Teachinfourth said...

I'm late to get-togethers with friends, but always on time to things like work...go figure.