Blackmailed

I am innocent.

I didn't do what they are saying I did.

Even though they have a video. A very misleading video, I might add. A video that they like to play over and over and over again.

And they laugh. Out loud. As in rolling on the floor laughing.

At me.

I am innocent!

"So...what is on that video?" you may be asking.

Well, before we get into that, let me give you the whole story.

Brody, my middle child, had misplaced his phone. And then it died so there was no way to call it. He was really upset...almost to tears.

I had kindly asked all my kids to help find his phone.

Then I sternly asked them.

Then I angrily ordered them.

Then I yelled.

They kind of  looked. For five seconds.

I looked everywhere in the room he had last had it. I looked on the floor. I looked under the couch. I looked on top the couch. I looked on the tv table. I looked everywhere.

Finally I decided that maybe it was stuck in the couch. Things have been known to fall between the cushions and stay there unless the couch is jiggled enough.

So, in order to see if this was the case, I went to one side of the couch and began bumping the couch with the top of my thighs. And because I wanted the phone, if it was indeed there, to fall out, I used quite a bit of energy in the bumping of the arm of the couch.

My daughter, who was sitting on the floor across the room, not helping to look for the lost phone was busy recording me. Bumping the couch.

"Mom! Why are you humping the couch?" she laughed.

Where did she learn that word....and why would she think I was doing that to my couch?!?!

And that is what is on the video.

I am innocent!

I am innocent and I am being blackmailed.

I Learned It From My Kids: Go with your gut

She was being ridiculous.

We were rushing, trying not to be late to Kobe's band concert. I was hustling, getting on shoes, coats, and everyone loaded in the car. By myself.

She was being ridiculous.

"Mom, what if the house catches on fire while we are gone?" she asked.

"The house isn't going to catch on fire. Can you please get your shoes and coat on and hop in the van?" I asked.

She put on her shoes.

"Do you think if I leave Doggy (her special stuffed animal) she would catch fire too?" She was really concerned.

"Honey, the house isn't going to catch on fire. There is no reason for it to. Please get your coat," I pleaded.

She put her coat on, but continued to be concerned.

"Mommy, I just feel scared that the house is going to catch on fire," she told me just moments later.

"Kyla, the house is not going to catch on fire. I can't smell gas at all. We don't have a fireplace so there is are no open flames in the house. The dryer is not running," I reasoned.

"Do you promise the house won't catch on fire?" she asked.

"No, honey. I can't promise that it will not catch fire. But I can tell you that the chances of our house catching fire are next to zero. Our house will not be catching fire tonight. Please go get in the car."

"Okay, Mommy," she replied started for the car.

As I was buckling Brig into his car seat, I look over at the door and there Kyla was, struggling to get into the car. I could see the conflict on her face. Worrying about the house catching fire and not wanting to upset me. She was honestly worried that the house was going to go into flames.

So, in order to ease her stress and show her that there was nothing to worry about, I went back into the house. I noticed some lights on upstairs and went up to turn them off. On the way down, I happened to glance at the stove. Wouldn't you know it, one of the burners was on, flames and all. I had made lasagna for dinner and had apparently felt it needed to be simmered....all. night. long.

Could that have burned the house down? Maybe not. But because my daughter felt promptings that something wasn't right, we thankfully will never have to know.

Both of us learned a lesson that night. She learned that Lord speaks to her through quiet whisperings and impressions. The world calls it our "gut" feelings. We call it the Holy Spirit. She learned that there was a reason for those feelings and because she had listened to them, our lives were blessed.

I learned that the Lord speaks to all of us. But the key is listening. Often I get so busy with the busy that I forget to listen to the feelings or nudges from my Father. He wants to guide and protect my life and family, but he needs me to have a listening ear/heart/ gut.

Thank you, Daughter, for reminding me of this lesson.


What did you learn from your kids this week? Wanna share? Link up. I'm gonna keep this link open until Monday night. I would love to read about yours.

Wicked

Are your kids afraid you will poison them?

My kids are. I'm not sure where it comes from. Maybe from watching too many Disney movies...like Snow White and the evil step-mother giving her a poisoned apple? But I am not an evil step-mother. I am just plain mean-old mom.

I've never poisoned them before. I mean, that would just be begging for punishment because we all know who would be cleaning up that mess. I may have made them take a bite of a new recipe. But poison NEVER.

Well, this morning my daughter opened her lunchbox that has been in her backpack for a few days. "Oh. My. Gosh.! Why does my lunchbox smell like that?!!?"

"Probably because uneaten orange slices and soggy peanut butter sandwich crusts aren't meant to be left in your box for days," I explained.

So she got a Lysol wipe and tried to clean out the smell...but it wasn't coming out that easy. So I got some Lysol spray and sprayed some of it in there.

Big mistake.

"Is that poison?" she asked.

"Ummm, no. If it was poisonous I wouldn't put it in your lunchbox. I am mean, but not that mean. You will be fine. It will be fine. Now pack up your lunch and let's skidattle." 

"Uh-uh. I don't want to get poisoned. If I put my food in there, I will get sick," she said.

"Honey, all of your food is in bags. Nothing will touch what I just sprayed. Plus you just wiped it out....again. It will be fine."

"It is poisoned, I know it."

Poison. Heh. Little does she know that if I really wanted to poison her I would sneak a little something on her toothbrush at night. No. Maybe some special icing on that cookie.

Or maybe in an apple.

Bwahahahahahaha.....

Use the Force

We love Christmas music in our house. Love it. Have been listening to it since Nov 1. That's love, alright. I have a ton of Christmas music and so we need two months just to listen to it all.

We love Star Wars in our house. Not as much as you, Bethany, but we do love it. My kids walk around the house humming the "Darth Maul" song. Every Halloween, someone is someone/thing from Star Wars. We have the little guys, the Lego's, the music, the movies, the posters.

So what does Christmas music and Star Wars have to do with each other?

One of the Christmas songs that is on our favorite's list is Amy Grant's version of "Emmanuel." I hear my kids singing it often, but hadn't really paid much attention to the words they were singing. Not until yesterday. 

My daughter walked past singing, "He’s the Prince of Peace, Mighty God, Obi-Wan! Emmanuel."

"Did you just say Obi-Wan?" I asked.

"Yes. That's what it says. Prince of Peace, Mighty God, Obi-Wan!" she said.

I knew Christ had many names, I just didn't know Obi-Wan was one of them. I guess he is the Ultimate Force, so why not.

You can say that again.

My daughter hates school. No, you don't understand. She really hates school.

How do I know this?

Because she was screaming all morning through her tears, "I hate school. I hate it. I am not going. I hate school!!!!" from about 6:30am until about 7:36am. That's a lot of hating, wouldn't you say?

I sat her down to try and figure out exactly where all the hating was coming from.

"Do you like your teacher? Is she nice to you? Did she yell at you?" I asked.
"Yes I like her. Yes, she is nice. And no, she doesn't yell at me. I just hate school," she whined.

"Do you know anyone in your class? I know that would be very scary for you if you didn't have friends in your class."
"Yes, I have friends in my class. I just hate school."

"Umm...did someone touch you or hurt you at school. You are really upset, I am just wondering if something happened." (It had to be asked.)
"No! No-one hurt me. I would tell you if they did. Don't you understand? I just HATE SCHOOL!"

Big sigh.... I get it. I understand there are just some things in life that we hate doing. I personally hate grocery shopping. I avoid it when I can. Unfortunately we all have to eat. If we didn't I would be $600 richer a month. The things I could do with that money.

"I understand you don't like to go to school. But we go to school so that we can learn. The more we learn, the smarter we are, and the smarter we are the more successful we will be. Maybe you don't like 4th grade, but you might love 5th grade. The only way you can find out is if you finish 4th grade," I reasoned.

"I won't like 5th grade either!" she screeched. "I hate all school!"

"Oh, Love. You really only have two choices at this point. You can go to school with puffy, crying eyes. Or you can calm down, eat your breakfast and pray that Heavenly Father will help you make it through this day," I explained.

"I don't want to go to school. I hate school. I don't want to pray!"

Great. There was only one thing left to do. Pour on the guilt.
"Do you want Mommy to go to jail?" I asked.
"Ummm....no. I don't want you to go to jail."
"If Mommy lets you stay home from school everyday because you hate school, not because you are sick, then the cops can take Mommy to jail." A slight exaggeration, but in extreme situations it could totally happen.

This was an extreme situation.

She thought it over. "Fine. I will go to school. But I still hate it. A lot!" She wiped off her tears and got dressed. She let me fix her hair and she ate breakfast. She even walked out the door with a smile on her face.

My oldest son looked at me after she left and said, "Wow! She is emotional."

That was an understatement.

"Welcome to the world of women, my boy."