As I was struggling to choose what I should share with you, the list grew and the stories were too many to share in one post.
And so I introduce to you:
So I Married a Deaf Man!
ROAD TRIP
A few years ago, we decided to go on a road trip: From Arizona to northern California, to Idaho and then back to Arizona. At the time we had 3 children: 5, 3 and 9 months. The first part of the trip took 12 hours.
My husband sits down in the driver seat, all buckled up, water in hand, gum in mouth, sunglasses on, ready to leave. I am handing out goody bags, coloring books, crayons, water, etc. Making sure everyone is set to go. In goes the movie and off we go!
The first two hours are great. Then...
"She is touching me!"
"Can you open my water?"
"He is singing too loud!"
"Wahhhhhhh!"
"I can't hear the movie." "My water spilled."
"Wahhhhh"
"My crayon fell.""The sun is in my eyes."
"Wahhhhh."
"I can't hold it any longer.""Wahhhhh."
etc.
This continued for the next 10 hours. My head was about to explode. I would look over, and there was my husband, eyes ahead, oblivious to what was going on around him. He wasn't annoyed by the constant whining. The fighting didn't even phase him. The baby screaming at the top of his lungs...not even a flinch. This is what he heard:
................................................................................................................................................
A big fat NOTHING! He would occasionally look over at me, with my hair all a mess, eyes bulging out of their sockets, twitching all the while, and ask, "What's wrong?"
Once we got there and I had come out of my "special place", we had a blast.
About 5 days later, we loaded up again to head to Idaho. About three hours into this trip, Brian turns to me and asks if I would drive because he wanted to rest.
"Are you serious?" I asked, not wanting to get my hopes up. "Scoot over, baby!"
I hop into the driver's seat and start driving. He lays the seat back, closes his eyes and is about to fall into hibernation, when he feels a tap tap taping on his shoulder.
"He can't open his water."
Tap, tap, Tap..."Baby is crying."
Tap tap tap... "They are fighting."
Tap, tap, tap..."They need a movie."
Tap tap tap...Tap tap tap...Tap tap tap...Tap tap tap...
About 30 minutes later he turns to me and says, "Can we switch back?"
"No way, Buster! This is the noise that I have been dealing with for 14+ hours. It's all you."
Needless to say, he no longer offers to let me drive on long trips. But he also doesn't ask me "What's wrong?" when I have the permanent twitch on my face either.
(This post was inspired by Mama Kat's Writer's Worskshop Check her out!)
11 comments:
Gosh, I remember those long car trips with little ones. I can't say that I miss them! LOL
Too cool, too funny. It's amazing how even husbands who can hear still miss all those fun little noises that drive their wives, the mothers of their children crazy.
I am visiting from Mama Kat's and can't believe how much we have in common. I have 5 kids, 4 boys and 1 girl. I was almost (until we moved from CA to TN) an ASL interpreter, and my husband is (selectively)Deaf. Love your story and your blog!
~Allison
http://the-winfields-7.blogspot.com
http://luv-books.blogspot.com
Hee hee, that is funny. I would demand to drive part of the way, though!
haha, great post! my husband is selectively deaf, lol. I think he tunes out my voice tamber. Thanks for sharing. Following so I don't miss anymore "So I married a Deaf Man" episodes!
Oh what a hilarious post! I swear, husbands have some kind of trick or special ability to zone out the noise that kids make. My husband is also selectively deaf when it comes to a crying baby. He can sleep through it and when he's awake, not show any signs of hearing my daughter scream for attention. I've tried doing it but for some reason, I just can't for the life of me figure out how he does it!
That is so funny. During our car rides, I am the one who tunes out the kiddos and ignores the noise completely. My husband is the one who hears each and every peep or loud noise. They SNEEZED too loud...They BREATH too loud, and then, of course, is the fighting with which he can't deal at all. When that happens, he yells at ME and my self-imposed deafness goes away so I can get the kids to stop, (although can ANYONE ever get the kids to stop fighting???)
LIndsey Petersen
http://5kidswdisabilities.wordpress.com
that image of him chewing his gum, oblivious to the nagging going on behind him... too funny. But I must tell you, my husband CAN hear and he still tunes out our kids' nagging. Lucky man:-)
Thanks for the visit, by the way!
Oh that is funny!! My hubs would act as if he is deaf when on a long trip...I hope that twitch is better! =)
Hi Stef- thanks for visiting me at Family Trifecta.
I am so glad you commented because now I have found your blog and I love it. This post is great. I also loved the one above how you know you are a mom. All of those are so true.
I'm looking forward to your next installments of being married to a deaf man.
Thanks again and I'm looking forward to getting to know you.
Ok, this made Nick and I laugh SO HARD.
Thanks for sharing!
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