So I Married a Deaf Man: I wasn't talking to YOU!

Did your mom ever teach you that it is rude to tell secrets in front of people?

I try and tell my children this all the time. If it is that private, then you should be able to wait until we are in a non-public place to tell me. Unless the secret is that your brother is about to die, or you are going to wet your pants if you don't find a bathroom, then it can wait.

It is pretty impossible for Hubs to tell a secret in a public place. Let me clarify. It isn't hard for Hubs to tell a secret in public, unless it is a place with lots of signers. In that case, it is near impossible. You see, there really is no whispering in ASL. You're either signing or you're not. Granted, you can sign really close to your body and turn to the side. That is like whispering...but not really. Because if someone sees it, they hear it at full volume.

Like the time we were driving with my oldest, who at the time was maybe 2 years old. Hubs and I were secretly signing about whether to stop for ice cream or not. We decided against it. When we pulled into the garage, Kobe says, "Ice cream?" See, no secrets.

This also makes eaves dropping so easy in the Deaf community. You can look around a room, at the different conversations and understand what every group is talking about. It could be sports in one corner, clothes in the next, you in another. All there for the choosing.

It is because of this ease of eaves that Hubs doesn't always remember that I can't always hear what other people are saying in group settings.

Like a restaurant. He and I will be sitting and chatting, and he will look over at the people at the next table and ask me what they are talking about. Sometimes I can hear bits and pieces, but most the time I can't hear a word. Just because they are talking, doesn't mean that I can hear them.

 Because hearing people can whisper.