"Pound! Pound!! Pound!!!"
I roll over and look at the clock. 2:30am. What the...? Who is knocking at my door?
"Pound!! Pound!! Pound!!!"
I look over at my protector. There Hubs lies, fast asleep. Oblivious that someone is trying to kill us in the middle of the night.
I shake him......I shake him again. "Someone is here. Pounding on the door," I sign to him, in the dark. This was before night lights. Well, it was before any of our children needed night lights.
"Sam!! Pound!! Pound!! Pound!! We know you are in there!! Poundpoundpound!!"
Hubs and I walk to the door and peek out the hole. There stand two large strangers. For some reason, they think that Sam lives here.
How do I scare them away? Or at least let them know that there is a man in the house? What if they think it's just me and break in? Yes, I know we have the element of surprise, but somehow, in the moment, that isn't all that comforting.
We make a plan. "You tell them to go away. I'll get the broom, just in case," Hubs says. Stop laughing. We aren't violent people and the threat of having to sweep our floor would send anyone running.
In my bravest voice I say, "No Sam lives here. You have the wrong apartment." Lucky for us, they left.
This situation has happened several times. Once it was a police officer looking for someone. Another time it was a guy who was high and bi-polar who swore that he had come to a party at my house and left his wallet. Then there was the time when security came at 3am to let me know my garage door was open. All pretty scary when it is night.
I am a tough woman, but I don't sound like a man. Most the time I am thankful for this. But there are times when it would come in handy. Like at 2am.
So we did the only thing that made sense.
We bought a dog.
9 comments:
Oh I hate living in the country but I love it as well cause we have big dogs..
As always, this is written with great humor (especially the part about the very notion of sweeping your floor being a deterrent), but it's so interesting, too.
Having to be the one to yell through the door WOULD be strange...
Sounds like you pulled it off, though...man voice or not!
=)
Scary stuff! You should get a tape record a man's voice and keep it near the front door....like in Home Alone! :)
Wow! This is scary! I am so glady you got a dog.
I remember when I bought the house and realized that I'd have to be the one to protect the kids.
There's nothing mean and ferocious about me.
Unless you mess with my ice cream.
We actually had a burglar in our shed in the back yard once...Hunky Hubby did not hear a thing. I finally woke him up and when I went to call the cops he asked me who on earth was I calling!? A truck drove into our living room once and he didn't wake for that either. Did I mention he is hearing? Broom...lol!
great reason to get a dog! i mean the only other option would have been learning how to cock a shot gun so the scary middle of the night visitors would shake in their boots. :)
I think a big dog is the best security system! If anyone knocks on our door my dog lets out a big booming bark. Don't tell anyone but she wouldn't harm a fly!
Oh wow, crazy! I need to get you a sign. "We love guns" Then you can hang it on your door. :D
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